Better Understanding of a Higher Power

I was recently asked how I have integrated my Buddhism with an idea of a higher power. The question was hard for me to answer. I have an idea of how this works in my life, a sort of abstract feeling of how it all goes together and it works well for me. However, I could not explain it.

Having an engineering background, I am of a firm belief that if you cannot fully explain and teach something in terms others can easily understand, then you do not have a full understanding of it yourself. This has sat with me the last few days.

When I first started this path I’m on, things were so different. I was new in recovery, scared, and had no real idea of what a higher power was, or what it was to me. I had my mother’s god, the one taught to me when growing up; he was loving and caring, but a bit vengeful when the rules were not followed and there was lots of hellfire and brimstone. Having broken so many of those rules, I had very little hope this god would help me. Lucky for me, this was wrong.

As my practice in meditation and the Dharma grew stronger, I started hearing more and more about this concept of being born with Buddha nature. That is, I am and always have been complete and have all I need inside. I just have to do the work to clear away the delusion and obscurations of that true nature. This however left me with a quandary: how am I supposed to look to myself in this path, when I was taught in order to stay sober I had to look to a higher power outside of myself?

This sat heavy with me for a long while. I spoke with others in sangha about this question, and was told to sit in meditation with it and the answer would come. The more I sat with the question, the more I realized the idea of separateness from a higher power is a delusion of the dualistic mind. There is no self! My answer was in the concept of Not-Self. If there is no separation of my mind, or the guru’s mind, or the mind of enlightened ones – or even the mind of all the Buddhas who have come before – then there is no separation of me from my higher power. There is no separation between me and you, just clouded perception; only an incorrect view.

This frozen view of self, this idea of a separate ego, it’s as if my mind is an iceberg floating in the ocean. Separate but the same. One day, one lifetime, I will have purified my view enough that this iceberg will melt and merge back into the sea. The sea was a part of me the whole time, only held separate through a frozen view. The true nature of the mind will be revealed to me; no more separation, no more frozen view.

Knowing this has allowed me to have an even greater communion with my higher power. I have a clearer path to understand what my higher power’s will for me is on a daily basis. I no longer feel the need to name or make separate my higher power, for it is in everything and everyone. I stopped looking for where it is, because nowadays I can no longer find where it is not. From the person going slow in the fast lane, to H.E. Garchen Rinpoche. All precious teachers, all ways, my higher power is speaking to me, teaching me, showing me its will for me on a daily, hourly, and minutely basis.

Should I forget, should I lose skillful view, I have only to stop, close my eyes, and count my breath. When I come back to the present moment, there is my higher power waiting patiently and lovingly for me to return. It never leaves, because it’s never gone. It is in everything and everyone including me. I have only to stop, be mindful and skillful in this moment for my view to adjust and my will to align with the will of the Dharma. That is, for me, to be of maximum service to all sentient beings.

Anger

If there were no anger what would you be feeling ? I had never   thought about it like that before. That one statement hit me hard and in that instant I could see what the anger really was for me. What anger had been doing for me all these years .

Anger is the great Lie the great mask. It can and does blot out all other feelings. Feelings of hurt, regret, sadness, and longing all blotted out by anger. Battling anger head on, Has never worked. I cannot put out a fire with fire. For me it has to be a choice. A choice to let anger free and see what is below it. To feel what is there . What have I let anger mask for so many years. Feelings of Loss, Hurt , Betrayal, abandonment, A deep sadness all there, waiting and hoping to be felt and expressed. Waiting and longing to be free. To become the impermanent phenomena that they are.

Through my own aversion to these feelings I have bound them to myself for so many years. Years of the same cycle. The same walk, down the same street, falling into the same hole when I know it is there. For years I felt there was no choice this was not correct view. With one simple statement years of anger had been put into the correct light for me to see, what it truly is and was and has allowed me the choice to let it go. To experience it for what it is and truly find the root. To truly feel and not to push away things that are unpleasant. To be with what is and to be ok with it.

To Love Ones Self

I never truly knew how I felt about myself until I spent six days in silence with complete strangers. It’s the faces you see. They become mirrors of your own ill will towards yourself. You tend to project your inner self hatred onto them. Next thing you know the story in your mind is so fantastic it even comes complete with a lynch mob.

Of course I have no real basis of comparison. For all I know it may be the same if you truly love yourself. I don’t know? I would like to think it is a series of warm loving feelings over and over. Every time someone passes you, another feeling of warm loving kindness. Who knows?

What I do know is, that is what I would like others to experience when they pass me.

Nothing is wrong

What if nothing is wrong ? This sticks with me. Resonates within me often when I meditate. What if nothing really is wrong? What if it just is? That is in fact the truth nothing is wrong until I judge it. Until I label it as such. Inherently things are not wrong or right they just are. It is not until my mind comes in and starts throwing labels and judgments around on everything it comes in contact with does it become anything other then what it is in that moment.

Through my attachment and aversion to what is happening in the moment I let the moment slip away. I judge as wrong or right or pleasant and unpleasant. In that one label my mind goes into a whole pattern of reactions to the label I have just put on the situation. A pattern worn deep into the groves of my mind by constant habitual reactions. If it is unpleasant aversion kicks in I want it away, I want to pretend it is not there or not happening. If it is pleasant I want more and more and more till either it makes me sick, hurts me, I hurt it, or I finally get bored with it and move on to the next pleasant addiction.

the Constant habitual cycles of my mind are what my meditation helps me with. The more I further my practice the more room I get between thought and reaction. It is in that moment if am lucky enough, I get to respond in a skillful mindful way.

Vinny Ferraro has a mantra I learned early on in meditation. It is “nothing to do , nowhere to go, no one to be, Nothing is wrong . ” This mantra to me sums up everything I need to here in relation to my constant Attachment and aversion.

Nothing to do. In this moment I have nothing else to do but what I am doing in this moment. If I am mindful in this moment and not worried about what I am going to do next I can devote my full attention to experiencing whatever there is to experience in that one moment. I will not be a sleep I will be Awake and present for whatever comes my way.

Nowhere to go. I am constantly in a rush and for no reason most of the time I really have nowhere to go to but I want to rush off to there any way. By doing this I never allow time to settle into the moment to just be with whatever is. My mind by keeping me constantly rushing around has effectively distracted me from the moment at hand. I can no longer interact effectively or respond loving and compassionately if I am not present in the moment . If I am constantly worried and fixated about getting somewhere in time. This expectation or attachment to being in a certain place at a certain time can and often does distract me from the moment I am in and once again I am asleep not fully present.

No one to be. For years I did not love myself enough to be ok with who I am. I always strove to be different then what I was. Whether doing it to vie for the attentions of one person or another or to try and get the cool kids to be my friend. I was constantly hiding and denying who I really was deep down. Then when this self would pop up I would go through a range of emotion from hate to intense anger for being me. Not a lot of love or compassion for me, For who I was in this moment. The further I come in my practice the more I come to appreciate who I am in this moment. I have forgiven myself of past digressions and truly come to love who I am from moment to moment. The only way I was able to do this was to realize there is no one to be. I am who I am in this moment and this moment only.

Nothing is wrong. In this moment nothing is wrong nothing can be. Wrong right pleasant unpleasant are all tricks of the judging mind. The moment is what it is and cannot be changed. It is my task to try and let go of my attachments and aversions so I can just be. In this moment it is like this. When I can reach this level of non attachment . Nothing truly is wrong. It is what it is and it is only my reactions to this that can change it in my mind. I have realized I have very little if any control over what goes on around me. What I do have is control over my reactions to it. I can take a situation that in light of all things is indeed very heavy with suffering and through my reactions to this suffering I can choose to stack on even more suffering on top of what is already there. It is my attachment to keeping something I have and my aversion to not getting something I want that can take a painful situation and stack suffering on top of it. Then I get the joys of suffering double.

Pain is unavoidable suffering is not.. In this lifetime we can be free from suffering if we choose to be in this very lifetime in this very moment we can rid ourselves from suffering if only we realize that this is how it is.

Motivation

One of the things I find hardest to keep up at times is my desire to meditate. I know the joys of a daily meditation practice. I know the benefits as well. Ten years ago when I started this path it was out of a search for relief. I was newly sober my emotions where completely out of control. I had developed clinical anxiety from the amount of LSD and Alcohol I had consumed over the last twenty seven years. So the motivation to sit was strong meditation was the corner stone of my life.

If I did not sit the anxiety would be so great I would not be able to function. My morose self pity of poor me and look at my life would get out of control and I would become miserably ineffective. I would be no use to my fellow man what so ever. So in pain motivation was always there.

After many years of steady meditation practice I seem to find bright shiny things to distract me. Projects, work, women, food, Facebook, You name it I can find it. So, manic enough, I can go a week without sitting. Once again I get all out of whack and I don’t even know why until I go to sangha for the week.

As I sit in meditation with my peers it becomes overwhelmingly obvious what I was missing all week. As I sit and count my breath and bring my attention on the now. I remember again that my primary goal is to enlighten for the benefit of all beings. Now as that is a lofty goal I know it will take much work and there is no time to lose. Yet still I will get distracted by all the shiny in this samsaric existence. I forgot it’s all an Illusion. Once distracted by all the shiny it’s not long before all I can see is the shit before my Bodhicitta is so low I forget how satisfying practice just for the sake of practice can be.

I am grateful for sangha it gives me the fire to burn through the darkness and be the light. The three jewels are the most precious things I have ever been given. Buddha, Dharma, Sangha what I am starting to see is you really can’t have one without the others. Each one of them leads to the other. From the Buddha came the great teachings of the Dharma and through the Dharma the Great community I am a part of was born.

In moments of silence I find deep and stirring gratitude.

Review of Galantamine: the Lucid Dreaming Pill

Galantamine has emerged as THE lucid dreaming pill. This natural supplement has been used for centuries in China as a memory enhancer, and was even noted by the ancient Greeks for its powerful mind-inducing effects.

Now we know that galantamine directly promotes dreaming sleep as well as lucid dreaming, which is the art of becoming self-aware in your dreams. There’s a lot of hype about galantamine, so I want to cover the basics about how it works on the brain, the studies that have proven its effectiveness, and my personal recommendations for experimentation with this safe and natural supplement.

However, I also want to be brutally honest about some of the mild psychological and physical side effects as well. I’ll also cover how to pair the supplement with mental and physical practices for best results.

Via Review of Galantamine: the Lucid Dreaming Pill | dream studies portal.

Sangha

Buddha, Dharma , Sangha The three jewels  and man are they the three jewels for a reason. I say this because I am often reminded of this fact. Take Sangha I started out in the Theravada school of Buddhism. It is what first made since to me. I liked this idea of shutting up sitting down and meditating to uncover and clear away the delusion from my heart.  I liked the fact at least from my limited view at the time that there was not a lot of ritual in it. There was a lot of emphasis on quiet meditation and the four noble truths and the eight fold path. I had a few friends that where of the Vajrayana school. I often would go to The Sakya monastery in Seattle to meditate and do Chenrezi practice. Never really committing to being one school of Buddhism or another, To me Dharma is Dharma it all came from one source there are just many different roads to the same ends. Or so I thought time went on and I kept up with the Sakya I really enjoyed the chanting, the mantra, and the visuals to me it seemed to prepare my mind somehow make it more fertile in a way for the teachings and for my meditation.

I took refuge there with H.H. Jigdal Dagchen Sakya and continued my weekly practice of Chenrezi sometimes I would show up for a Puja,  Still not putting myself all in and not really identifying with that Sangha. It was odd because if you had come to my house during that time and looked at my practice space it looked like a Tibetan monastery with thangkas brocade and bowls everywhere.

My practice at home stayed pretty steady mindfulness meditation. Then I heard about ngondro the preliminary practices of this tradition. Something about this idea resonated deeply in me. The night after I had heard about ngondro I had a dream about someone reading me the Bardo Thodol. I remember waking up with a feeling of no time to lose. I knew I had this perfect boat to help me and other beings out of the sea of Samsara and I felt as if I was wasting it.

I told my friend about all this and she got me the book on the practices of ngondro from the sakya and went over how to do them. I started them as they can take years to complete. Over the next two years I did my practices on and off with no real resolve. It was not until I made a resolve to finish my practices in a very timly manner that I started daily practices of ngondro.

Now the more practices I did habitually the more I started to see the reasoning behind them and the more the path of Vajrayana started to unfold and make since to me. The more effort I put in the more Dharma bloomed in my mind. My view was adjusting and I knew this was my Sangha this was my school. I went to a Talk by  H.E. Garchen Rinpoche a man who upon sight made me realize the truth behind Guru devotion a practice which up until that point I had an aversion to, due to my incorrect view. However merely upon seeing this great man I was put in an environment that had the correct causes and conditions for that view to be corrected.  He said that it is our Karma that brings us to our practice not the other way around. That is my past lives the actions and practice in them is what has shaped my mind to be the vessel for the dharma I am to carry in this lifetime. Upon hearing that I knew it was truth. There was no need to explain no examples needed I just knew it was truth when I heard it.

So even though it’s all one dharma I found at least for me some roads are better to walk then others. Some ways of teaching and preparing my mind move me more than others. This does not mean one school or tradition is better worse or indifferent than any other it just means that my cup seems to hold this one better than others.

I have been given a great opportunity I have achieved precious human birth I have encountered the dharma I have access to not just one great teacher but three and I have a Sakya linage monastery not more than 20 minutes away from me. I am very grateful that I get to practice this profound path for the benefit of all beings.

 

Freedom If you want it

Growing up the way I did left me angry and bitter at the whole world around me. The survival skills I had adopted not only kept people who would hurt me away. They also cut off any help that would come my way. It was constantly not what I felt I needed or wanted. I always ended up trying to depend on them too much or demanding total control.

Time and time again I would smack people’s hands away. Eventually people stopped trying to help. That only fueled me more. ” How dare they not help me! Cant they see I am in pain ? Why won’t you help me ? ” It was a constant game of screaming ” Everyone just leave me alone!!” Anyone? Hello ?” A constant cycle of me pushing people away and then blaming them for leaving. It was a lonely miserable existence but one of my own making. Sure I did not get the ball rolling that was my early experiences in life’s job. However I am the one who chose to keep it rolling. Time and time again I would Alienate all who cared all who wanted to help.

The cycle was a deep rooted one and took many years for me to break. First I had to look at these situations and see where my part in them was. No matter what the situation was. Whether I felt I had a right to be angry or not. Whether it really was something shitty that happened. I had to look at all the incidents that I was reliving daily. The ones that where rotting me out from the inside. I had to find my part where I might be to blame and see how I could have done this better. In the incidents where I found no real wrong on my part I had to find forgiveness for their part. In fact in all incidents in my life I had to find forgiveness. It was the only way I found to true freedom from the past.

Finding this forgiveness was not easy in many of these situations. I found it easier if I was able to put myself in their shoes see it from there point of view. Then I could have empathy and compassion, For most of the time my abusers lived through the exact pain I did and once again it was that pain that allowed me to identify, care for and come to love my abusers . Some of them only enough to see what pain had done to them. In others it allowed me to love them with all my heart and soul again whether I allowed them back in my life or not. It was my love for them that freed me from my suffering .

My chains have always been of my own making no matter the cause. Experience gives me the raw material and I have the choice to either build chains and a cage over my heart or to use this material to build a stairway to freedom. To use the pain to block out all things that would help me leaving me isolated and alone or take that pain and use it as a spring board for growth.

We are all entrusted with a certain amount of pain in our lives it is unavoidable. Some more than others. I believe the point to all this pain is to be the touchstone of growth. To give us something to make us uncomfortable. I have found for me at least that I do not just decide to change things it takes a certain amount of pain to motivate me. To move me enough to realize something has to change. As I get stronger in my practice I am able to see the need for change with less and less suffering. I am becoming more sensitive to the things on my life that are ear marks for change. For this I am grateful. It no longer takes a building falling on me for me to realize its time to change now it only takes a house. One day I hope for a small shed or fence. We shall see.

My life with Ani Difranco

 

Let me start out this by saying. I have always listened to Ani Difranco. Growing up in the area I did every ooh rah chick I knew listened to Ani as some kind of Affirmation of being a strong women. Me being a man, I did feel a little odd listening to Ani and enjoying it as much as I did. No big deal however I was ok with this.

It was not until the end of a particularly rough five year relationship with a girl. A relationship that had been rough due to my own actions and inability to change them at the time. See I had this habit of putting anything and everything in my body and treating everybody and anybody who gave a shit about me like dog shit. Ya weird habit I know. After five years of this you can see why she would want to move on to someone who actually treated her like a human being. Much less someone who was actually nice to her and knew how to express love. So there I was alone again and feeling oh so sorry for poor little ole me. Some where in all this I had missed where I was wrong. Some where in all this I had missed my own actions.

Now this girl who left loved Ani Difranco to a Crazy degree. Used to have discussions with me on how Ani had Changed her life and made her see things in a different way. So in the midst of all this feeling sorry for my self and drinking a shit load I was reorganizing my cd’s and came across the ani block of things. I found little plastic castles and put it in.

The first song is As is. I remember just sitting and really listening to the lyrics for the first time. It was an odd juxtapose for me sitting there listening to that song. Normally when you listen to
“break up “ sad music you are the singer at least that’s how it works for me. I identify with what the singer is saying belting out righteous lyrics, Declaring my indignation and hurt, but oh how I will survive and be stronger in the long run. However this was not what was happening at this point. It was if Ani was singing about me and suddenly it dawned on me I was an asshole. In that moment I was hearing the other persons side of things. For the first time in my life I realized that other people mattered too. “Just give up and admit your an asshole. “ That lyric stuck in my head. Could it be that easy just admit I was wrong ?

Through out that night I listened to every Ani album I had. Every song about Failed relations and lost love forced me to think more and more where I had been at fault in the past .Every lyric of how hard she tried to save something that was unsolvable cut me deep and forced me into further introspection.
I could finally see that as humans all we really want to be is happy. I saw that we are deserving of that happiness. I finally saw that I could not achieve my happiness at the expense of others. All simple things that had eluded me over the years. I was inundated with all the shit I had pulled in the past and had no where to put it all.

That one night changed my life forever. You see, because the universe has a sense of humor for sure. The next night I ended up in An alcoholics anonymous meeting with a friend. I was there to support him He felt a bit nervous going there alone. It was a book study and we all got to read. When It came time for me to read I started right where the person before me left off and I read out loud. “ After a few years with an alcoholic a wife gets worn out, resentful and uncommunicative. How could she be anything else.” and there again Ani was there pointing out her side of things and I listened. It was in that moment I realized What I needed to do but with out the ground work that was laid the night before I probably would have never been receptive enough to realize what was being said to me. Through the words of Bill Wilson and the first one hundred drunks. In the book of Alcoholics Anonymous. Fast forward 8 years and life is great I am better and always trying to change and grow for the better. Funny how it all start from one long night of introspection. Just me and Ani. Her pointing it out and me acknowledging it and wanting it to change.